Moving Forward

So I have done a lot of thinking since my last post and this is what I came up with. The devil will use anything to hold you down and prevent you from reaching your goals or hinder you from the path that is in front of you. For example... People who fear being alone will dwell on not having someone to be with, people struggling to have a child seem to dread being pregnant for fear of loosing another child, people who fear burying their children will dwell on things they cannot prevent, dangers that they cannot stop their children from and so on... We hold these things so close to us that we won't see anything else and we become miserable and held down. And rightfully so...all of these things are terrible and are understandably difficult to deal with, which in comparison to me makes mine seem so trivial.One of the things I dwell on is be unappreciated and overlooked. I finally let go and really decided that it doesn't matter if people see or appreciate what I do, because ultimately I am doing it because it is the right thing to do. When did I start caring about what other people think anyways. I always just did my own thing and did what I knew to be true a right. Well, when I finally let go wouldn't you know people started appreciating what I did. I found myself then really having to pull myself back to thinking it was nice that people noticed but whether they notice or not is not the matter. So that is where I am at right now.
I am hoping that now I have cleared my head I can get back to my goals and aspirations and stop dwelling on things that I don't have control over or don't matter. We will see how it goes!

First Blog

So I have never actually done a blog before so here it goes... Kaitlynn is 8 months and AWESOME!!! She has 5 teeth now and is trying to crawl. I wish she was crawling already but I am not disappointed. Kaitlynn was away from me for the first time this past week and it was not what I expected. I realized how much Kaitlynn makes me feel better about myself. I do so much for people at work, I do so much for my Husband and I try to be there no matter what for my friends family and co-workers/employees/employers and it is never enough for anyone. I can never get things right. With Kaitlynn I can do what ever she needs from me and it is enough. It made me want to cry. I felt so... incompetent? I don' know if that is the word I am looking for or not but I felt like I was just useless. I felt like a useless wife, friend, supervisor and no one really changed that. I also felt unappreciated. I don't really know what I can do about that. Well Kaitlynn is back and she was so much bigger. I love that little girl her smile is the BEST thing in the world and ALWAYS makes me feel better.